Homewrecker

That's me. A homewrecker. Actually, Kris Kringle and I together are homewreckers. We just destroyed the beginnings of a nest for barn swallows for the second time this week. The irony of us squashing the dreams of a couple who just wants a family is not lost on me.

Photo courtesy of lisaandroger.com

Barn swallows like to build their nests on narrow ledges, and two of them decided the border around the balcony of our third floor apartments was a great spot. At first, it was cute. We'd notice them flying around and chirping to each other, but then the nest started. The bigger the nest got, the more territorial they got. We knocked it down once a few days ago (it wasn't even 10% complete), and then we had to do it again today (it was more like 15%-20% complete).

I feel like a jerk for doing it, but they made it pretty clear that we weren't going to be able to coexist out there. All we have is that that teeny little balcony for outdoor time in our apartment. They are pooping everywhere and hover like crazy if we even open the door and look outside.

After destroying the nest the first time, I immediately thought of the little bird couple who is just trying to do what they are wired to do naturally in order to have a family and be fulfilled, just like KK and me. What right do I have to go out there and tell them their plans are going to have to change? Who am I to tell that little couple that? What will this barrier to building their family do to their relationship, their existence?

Am I thinking too much about this?

Post-surgery update: I had my surgery two weeks ago today. I've been charting mostly 10C/10CK 1x-2x/day, but today and yesterday, I've experienced 10K/AD - I've never experienced that two days in a row before! KK and I decided to buy a vowel* last night, and it felt completely different, almost like how it felt when were buying vowels (ha!) for the first time and I would have a lot of fluid. We both noticed the difference. I really hope that there's something to this change in CM! I know it's really too much to hope for conceiving so quickly after surgery. I'm still sticking with the goal of just getting a period very soon, but it's so fun to think about, and a little hope never hurt anyone, right?

*Buying a vowel. I heard this term in a Facebook group. Someone's husband made a Wheel of Fortune joke related to how you chart intercourse using the Creigh.ton Model, and I absolutely loved it, surprised that my own corny husband didn't think of it first. I'm not a fan of DTD or more explicit language, so I think I just found my euphemism for, well, you know. :)