Post-Surgery = Better Than Expected

I'm about 3 days post-op, and I'm so surprised at how good I feel! I feel like the laparoscopy was a much more difficult recovery the first few days. I'm very "aware" of my abdomen, and it feels like each organ is a heavy water balloon, moaning when I move. I was able to sleep on my side the first night, and I'm generally having no issues getting up and moving around.

According to my doctor, everything went perfectly during surgery. This time, I didn't move on the operating table while under anesthesia, so my worst fear of one of my ovaries getting laser-ed off because I moved again didn't come true! I was able to go home the same day. Waking up was definitely tougher this time because I was under for much longer, but when I stood up to use the bathroom for the first time, I felt much better and ready to go home. I've had some narcotics to help with the pain, and I've been really comfortable overall.

Kris Kringle and  I had our post-op appointment at PP.VI yesterday, and that also went really well. We watched video from my surgery. It was amazing to see how they used a laser to cut away the tissue that had endometriosis on it and how they used a special technique to sew up those areas in a way to prevent adhesions. It was so frickin' weird to see how they used to laser to cut out huge chunks of my ovaries and sew them back together. 

Dr. K. was incredibly positive about next steps. She is always very careful with her words and never says anything like, "You should expect to have regular cycles." Instead, she said, "Most women end up having regular cycles." We'll wait up to 3 months to see what happens. I will continue to chart, and when I have my second cycle (!), we can start doing chart reviews, where I get my blood drawn on P+7 (oh my gosh, I'm going to have a P+7!??!!?!) and we see how I'm functioning. Dr. K. also said it's very possible I will need some help from Clomid, so we could start that as soon as my third cycle (I'm going to have cycles?!?!? SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!).

KK left the appointment feeling like a million bucks, full of hope, so excited. I was more subdued just because I still can't wrap my brain around our reality changing. Getting periods again, charting differently, all that jazz, it seems so impossible after all we've experienced. I'll believe it when I see it. Is it wrong to feel that way? I am hopeful. Really, I am. But I just can't let my mind -my heart- go there. Not yet. Maybe once I get a period, that will change how I'm feeling. Right now, even a period feels like a shot in the dark.

I think charting will really help. I have a record of my body's signs, and I should be able to detect a difference here soon. I mean, my ovaries are 1/3 the size of what they were. One-third! That's bound to change something.

God, thank You for a successful surgery without any complications. I am so grateful to have a recovery that seems light and easy so far. Perhaps now it's OK to hope a little more? Please help to me to find that right balance between hope and reality, and please remind me that the reality is that through You, all things are possible.